We Say Things About Fantasy Soccer. Why Should You Care?
To whom it may concern, especially if you are not from the United States:
Greetings from America.
After a grueling number of days, weeks even, since the 2016-17 season ended, the 2017-18 Premier League season is finally here. As of right this moment, nearly 3.7 million people are subjecting themselves to the mental and emotional torture that is Fantasy Premier League. We know that lots of folks out there are offering “tips” or “advice” that will “help” you “succeed” at the game, but we think you should give us, the Fantasy Soccer FC Podcast, at least one look, possibly a low-level ogle or two, maybe even some prolonged leering if you’re from Huddersfield 😉
Right off the bat, some of you long-time, non-American football fans might be thinking, “They said ‘soccer’. And now they punctuate by putting the period outside the quotation mark. I think we’re done here.”
Please, don’t be done here. We come in peace, so give peace a chance. You wouldn’t want to not give peace a chance and disgrace the memory of John Lennon, would you, you warmonger?
Yes, it is true. We are three Americans who love sports, especially football, particularly that of the Premier League, and our vulgar upbringing forces us to say “soccer”. But as England’s greatest teacher, Albus Dumbledore, said, “We are only as strong as we are united, as weak as we are divided.” So let us be united by football and soccer, but not the Manchester kind.
Need more reasons? How about 3 more reasons?
1. We know and like many British things.
Where would we be without The Kinks, Monty Python, Danger Mouse, Shaun of the Dead, or Peppa Pig? Tossed in a bin somewhere, that’s where!
2. John Stones kind of sucks.
That counts as a reason, right?
3. You might just learn something on our podcast.
Not only will you get useful FPL advice, you get at least 4 other things too. From Brian’s How to Say segments where unlike most match announcers, we at least try to do justice to player names, to Scott’s Incomplete Club Histories or his filthy, filthy limericks, to Dave’s nearly bipolar Arsenal Moments, there is something for possibly at least 1,000 of you!
There are more reasons, but maybe you should just discover them for yourself. All you have to do is find us on iTunes, subscribe, and listen. Then rate us 5 stars. Then go get a pint and think about us, your would-be friends in the US.
Sincerely,
David, Scott, and Brian – The Fantasy Soccer FC Podcast
